Showing posts with label LivingSingle. Show all posts
Showing posts with label LivingSingle. Show all posts

Monday, 8 August 2016

Harry Potter Author, J.K.Rowling Was A Single Mum When She Became A Millionaire!

With a global brand worth of 15 Billion Dollars and making Forbes list as the first woman billionaire from writing books, did you know that Harry Potter author, J.K.Rowling was a single mum?

Infact as at the time she wrote the first Harry Potter book, she was living on state welfare benefits for herself and her child in the UK!

Today, her story is different, she is married, has more children and continues to make more money from her Harry Potter books which have been made into movies and continues to sell in millions yearly.

J.k.Rowling's also makes sure that she gives a huge chunk of her earnings to charities including single parent families as according to her, she knows how challenging it can be.

I want to encourage a single mum today not to give up on herself or her dreams. The fact that you are a single mum today is not a full stop in the story of your life. Rather, its a comma that will lead to a more robust story that will encourage others.

Do you know J.K.Rowling also went through domestic violence in her first marriage before having the courage to run with her daughter. After this, she lost her mum and went through a phase of depression and suicidal thoughts.

Its not strange to go through these kind of situation and personally, I can relate especially at a period of my life when I could barely feed my children and had to take them to people's houses to eat under the guise of visiting those people whether I was invited or not.

Never be ashamed of your life story because life has been formed to come in phases. The way forward is not to get too caught up in one phase that you don't move to the next.

Today, J.K Rowling is one of the most important and powerful women in the UK. She was a single mum like you and I but didn't allow that stop her from becoming a positive driving force in life.
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Saturday, 23 July 2016

My Testimony...You Can Turn Fear Into A Positive Thing!

These past few days have been very tough on me emotionally in so many ways. First of all, my daughter moved from Junior Secondary to Senior secondary school and my son graduated from Primary to Secondary school! I am sure you are wondering hey, that's so much to be grateful for and honestly saying thank you to God even seems too small for how far he has kept me through this journey of raising 2 children as a single mum.

I really can't help but be grateful to God for seeing my son Ayolana finish his primary education even though its bittersweet because it should have been him and his twin sister, Ayomipo graduating to secondary school but unfortunately she didn't live beyond the age of 1. Yes its been more than 9 years since she died but the truth is one never forgets the loss of a child. However, I still have a lot to thank God for as regards his protection and provision for my kids and I.

I look at these children and I am amazed at how God did not allow me be put to shame concerning them. I won't lie the journey has been tough and continues to be. I have had to change their school three times because of school fees but to the Glory of God my children have been troopers throughout all these upheavals.

Why am I now suddenly so blank emotionally? I won't lie its simply because the journey continues and fear wants to creep in somewhat. Oh yes, I trust God will see me through afterall He has been there for us all this while and will continue to be but the human part of me still worries. However, I am writing this to encourage someone today to ALWAYS make God number one because so many times people ask me 'Bimbo, how are you doing it?' some even say 'Bimbo you are a strong woman!' 

Please be not deceived, the strength only comes from God and trust me I break down so many times and cry in my room, have sleepless nights and still show up with Mary Kay on my face looking like iceblock will not melt in my mouth...Lol! Let me even say I still cried like a baby a few days ago. However, what continues to keep me going is the fact that God is truly a rewarder of those that diligently seek Him. 

Yes, I am afraid of the next journey in my children's lives especially with new school fees coming up especially since its a new session and we all know how school fees are not smiling these days but then I am confident in the fact that God will ALWAYS make a way where there seems to be none.

So to any single mum reading this, keep on keeping on and when those overwhelming times come (trust me they will!), remind yourself that God has not brought you this far to leave you. You also have to be strong in your mind because even though some people are there to encourage you, if you don't believe in yourself, you won't go far or achieve much.

Its okay to be afraid but rather than allow that fear cripple you and make you slip into depression, allow it push you forward and see it as FACE EVERYTHING AND RISE (FEAR)!
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Tuesday, 12 April 2016

Happy About My Friends Remarriage, But What About Mine?

I found out that one of my friends who had been divorced for about 8yrs got remarried over the weekend and I was so excited for her. She had been through a horrible 3/4 year marriage prior to this and seeing her looking all beautiful and happy in her wedding pictures yesterday, really gladdened my heart.

However, looking at the pictures also made me feel 'somehow' in my heart. I felt a kind of longing for remarriage as well and immediately started rebuking every spirit of envy (as a child of God na...Lol!) As if that wasn't enough, I showed my mum and son the pictures because they also know her and what comes out of my son's mouth immediately is, "mummy, you must be next o!"

What?! next for Wetin? Well, I really can't blame him because just about 2 weeks ago, another of my divorced friends got remarried too. Now before you start thinking" why is Bimbo surrounded by such people?" asides from being in that same situation myself, we just reached out to be support systems to one another which has helped somewhat.

14 years ago when I said 'I Do", it wasn't my intention to leave the marriage 7 years after in 2009. Unfortunately, it happened but hey, life goes on. Do I regret leaving? NO! But I wish I had taken time to do the proper thing before even getting married in the first place.

Fast forward to now, 7 years later of being on my own with 2 children in the mix as a single mum trust me it hasn't been an easy road. The truth is I miss being part of a couple, I miss having a man to call my own,I miss having a man watching out for me and the children, I miss having a man support me financially, I miss having a man treat me like his queen and heck I miss having great sex with a man that loves me ( in the confines of marriage of course! Lol)

However, what it really balls down to is, am I sure of getting married again? I have asked myself this question over and over again and I won't lie, I still don't have an answer!  Yes, I am seeing remarriage stories and pictures left, right and centre but then, I have many friends in marriages now who tell me "horror stories" that make me wonder if marriage is by force or really compulsory.

Truth be told though, there are also some marriages that seem like heaven on earth not that they don't also have issues but they seem to be able to make it work and be happier for it. So while I believe God for such, I have decided to just calm down and not allow myself get pressured into making another mistake on the marriage route. 

I also want to encourage anyone who finds themselves in this situation, either you have never been married before or you are  believing God for a remarriage after a sour experience, GOD HAS NOT STOPPED BLESSING HIS OWN and His word says NO GOOD THING WILL HE WITHHOLD FROM THOSE WHO LOVE HIM!

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Wednesday, 30 March 2016

When Reaching The 'Zenith' Becomes A Reality!

Looking through my wallet, my eyes catch a glimpse of my Zenith bank ATM card and a big smile crosses my face. Now, this is not because there is money in the account (money will definitely come in Jesus name) but the fact that I even have an account with Zenith bank in the first place.

I was a banker for about 9 years prior to joining the media and I worked in 3 different banks so I know the position and standard Zenith bank has always held. In fact in 2001, at the time other banks like Gt Bank where allowing people use  50k and 100k to open savings and current accounts respectively, for Zenith Bank it was 100/500k and in some cases 1 million Naira for current accounts.

What this meant was that Zenith bank was strictly for the rich and those with clout whether you liked it or not. Fast forward to a few months ago when my office decided to move our salary accounts to Zenith bank.As I look at the card now, what comes to mind is the fact that ANYTHING is possible and we should NEVER say NEVER. Yes, I really wanted a Zenith bank account going on 8 years ago or more but today, I have it and it came with such ease via my office.

God used this card to draw my attention to the fact that He is able to break protocols on our behalf if we can just trust and hold on to Him. I am gradually learning that NOTHING is impossible for me to get with God on my side and a lot of belief on my part.

So that my Aunty Bimbo Global business, house in Ikoyi and access to luxurious things in life will gradually become a reality!

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Tuesday, 22 March 2016

How Does One Help Others In Need?

"Bimbo, my landlord has taken me to court because of my house rent issue, it has been due for over a year, now and despite begging him, he has refused to listen. What will I do now!"

I woke up this morning to the above message from a friend of mine who is a widow with a daughter and I was heartbroken. Yes I gave her lots of encouragement and advice via prayers but I felt like a fraud because I couldn't physically help her and it really dampened my spirit.

I have been open about my personal journey as a single mum with all the serious struggles I have gone through and the truth is I have also encountered accommodation issues, not being able to pay my children's school fees for more than a year and even doing very menial jobs just to make ends meet for myself and my 2 kids but I thank God that today I can boldly say God continues to see me through. I might not be there yet financially but I am definitely not where I used to be where I even had to be collecting money from the mallam in front of my house to be able to cook for my children.

The truth is in all these times, it seemed like God was so far away, not even listening or even aware of my problems but over time I have come to realise that He has always been there and there is always a reason He allows us go through whatever comes your way but His name is eventually glorified in it all as long as one make Him the pillar.

However, how does one really add value asides just offering advice to people especially when you have gone through what they seem to be going through and have come out of it and they come to you for help? 

I am not yet financially stable to the point where I can meet such financial needs but is there a way people in such dire straits can get help?

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Monday, 14 March 2016

Women Should Support One Another Right?

Its not strange to see some women say men are their best friends because according to them having female friends usually ends up in backbiting, jealousy and envy.

Personally, I won't say I haven't experienced this because in the course of my life journey I have had quite a number of women I called friends disappoint me but truth be told, I have also had a few female friends also support and stand by me through thick and thin.

Like the saying goes, we shouldn't throw the baby with the bath water so it is important that we as women support other women which ever way we can and continue to hope that someday, all women will come together in one accord and not see one another as rivals or enemies.

In light of this, I was privileged to be chosen to be part of the Inspiring Change Tweet conference organised by Sunmbo Adeoye who many used to know as singer, Tuface's baby mama until God turned her situation around and she is now the wife of a pastor.

With this position, she now uses her past pain, reproach and struggle to encourage other women hence the Inspiring Change Conference. The Tweet part of the conference took place on International Women's Day on the 8th of March and I have decided to share my part of the session as it might also help encourage another woman to keep her head up.

They are just statements that have come out of my own struggles in life both as a single mum and a woman trying to live her life with the hand that fate has dealt.

These words still continue to keep me going and I hope it helps someone on their life journey to ensure that we live fulfilled lives devoid of unhappiness or depression. 

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Wednesday, 24 February 2016

When God Doesn't Seem To Make Sense?

Sometimes the word of God seems like clichés in our life such that even though we remind ourselves of His promises, when it truly happens, we are indeed like them that dream(Psalm 126: 1). This is exactly my analysis of what has been happening in my life and career thus far.

When I started my foray into the media world 4 years ago after a 9 year stint in the banking industry, I won’t lie, it seemed like an impossible task. In fact, prior to joining the media I had done soap making, corsage making, shawarmar & Chapman training, management training, hair and costume jewelry selling to mention a few.

All of these were towards making ends meet and getting something to feed my 2 children and I as a single mum.  However, in the course of this journey, there was no fufilment of any sort and I was just doing them as a means to an end.

One thing that was consistent in all these my different ventures  though, was the growth and strength of my relationship with God.  It became the case of "holding on to the hem of His garment" since I had chosen not to compromise my values just because I wanted to survive. 

It became a case of “its God or nothing” and I must confess it was a very difficult path to tread (although it gets easier with time) But the truth is, anytime I wanted to throw in the towel and break my resolve and compromise my faith or values, God will always show up and keep me going and I gradually came to understand that I didn’t have to sleep with any man to get money or be happy, rather, God is the one that can make a man or woman bless you.

In the course of learning this lesson. I also started to talk to God about a career especially since I wasn’t getting any younger and most of my friends and colleagues that we started together seemed to be way ahead in their careers with many already managers in their various industries. 

This was another difficult and painful pill to swallow but God made me come to understand that time and chance happened to all men and He hadn’t brought me thus far to leave me even though it seemed like every day was a continuous struggle with debts left, right and center.

I learnt how to ask God to direct my paths and order my steps which is something most of us need to do in order to align with God’s purpose for our lives. He finally led me into the media world where funny enough, a woman I had never met before, gave me a chance to work in her radio station.

I won’t lie, getting that job was indeed a miracle and I thought that was the biggest miracle ever, not knowing that God was just starting with me and I still had another battle to face in terms of proving my capability as an On Air Personality.  From News reporting, news production, news reading and finally becoming a presenter, it was a road filled with so many twists and turns.

I can't count the number of times I cried and even wanted to throw in the towel but because I had made God my Rock and reached the point where I couldn’t do anything without asking Him first, I stayed put, even when many times I will write my resignation letter and God will tell me NO!

This was also coupled with the fact that I kept telling God that I wanted to present programs that will add value to people’s lives and also serve as a way for me to tell more people about who God is through inspiration and motivation.

My chance eventually came and I was given a children and gospel show to present but the downside was that it was only on weekends! Imagine just working twice a week, while the other days were just administrative functions. This also became an issue for me and I kept asking God if this was really where he wanted me to be. His answer for me was, "I will use you for my Glory and announce you to the world….hmnnn, WHEN??!"

This was always my heart cry but then, it was another lesson that God was teaching me which was being patient and waiting for His time. Initially, I felt just presenting 2 days a week wasn’t enough to make any impact until I started getting feedback from people I didn’t even know as to how something I said or did on air actually made a difference in their lives. 

The children’s show was also another part that blew my mind because I found out I genuinely cared about the kids and parents I was presenting to and it stopped being a job for me but a mission that God had placed in my hands to do.

I finally got to the point where I decided even if its just one hour I have to talk on air, I MUST make it count and people’s lives MUST be positively impacted.  I also decided to always have an attitude of gratitude to God in all things, being confident of the fact that any situation I find myself in will always work out for my good. 

This resolve came up in November 2015 and today, February 2016, just 3 months after, the story has TOTALLY changed! First off came an award nomination of "On Air Personality of the Year" in December which I found amazing considering the fact that I used to present just 2 times a week.

In January 2016, the children’s show I present also got a Nigerian Broadcasters Merits award nomination as "Best Kiddies Show on Radio"

That’s not all, I now work practically every day of the week doing the same thing I was doing on weekends but this time reaching a wider audience. 

Why am I telling all this long story, it is to encourage someone reading this that God is not through with you yet! The fact that He allows you live to see another day means you still have an assignment you haven’t completed and the thing is that with God, His assignments are usually on a mega level. 

However, you need to get to that point where you “Let Go, Let God", align yourself with His will and wherever you may find yourself right now, just keep serving as unto the Lord. Make sure you are adding value to people in any way you can and it doesn’t even have to be financial.

Yes, I have sown some finances in the course of this career I am in, but it was money well spent because while some went into putting smiles on many children’s faces, others went into improving on myself by going for courses to build up myself personally and career wise so that I will always have more to give out.

I want to encourage you not to allow your environment or situation become a limitation to you because the truth is often time, we ourselves are the limitation and not anybody else. You can do or be anything you set your mind on as long as you make God number one priority and ensure it is geared towards adding value to others. 

Don’t allow people’s negative assumptions about you become your reality. Of course I have made some mistakes along the way but the truth is, as human beings we are always a work in progress so if at first you don’t succeed, pick yourself up and try again!

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Wednesday, 30 December 2015

Why You Need To Take Time Out To Reassess Your Life!

Where do I even start from as regards my reason for the long silence again? Well, I just have to apologise one more time, as my absence was due to me transforming myself into a better person so I can be of more benefit to you.

The last time I posted, it was to tell you about my rebranding from "Bimtheory" into "Aunty Bimbo" fully. The journey still continues and I have had some people ask me why. The truth is, you need to know who and what you stand for and make sure that everything about yourself aligns with this. Bimztheory was just a part of me and I needed to embody who I am completely in all forms and Aunty Bimbo is it!

For those that don't know, I was a banker for over 9 years and actually resigned in my 10th year due to so many reasons chief of which was the fact that banking wasn't really what I wanted to do. However, at that time I was married and financially I needed to support my hubby so staying in banking was very logical. Fast forward to leaving the marriage due to unfortunate circumstances and starting over, the banking career was the first thing that had to go and I needed to then heal and find myself.

After many trials and error among which was getting the American Project Management Certification, PMP, learning soap and insecticide vocation, selling hair and jewellry just to make ends meet with my 2 children, I finally landed in media which is what I would call my "Rehoboth

Being an On Air Personality has been like a dream come through for me especially with the shows I host which include the City Kids Show and Singspiration Zone which represents God and children. I have always wanted to add value and impact lives and to the glory of God, these shows are wonderful platforms in achieving this.

However, in life, one must always update and upgrade so you can always have more to offer, Even Jesus was always going to the temple and taking time off on His own so he can be renewed through communication with God. I had a moment of unrest despite being happy with my job and knew I needed to learn more and that is how I started praying to God to use me for His glory.

Somehow, I ended up attending a Goal Setting and Life Coach Certification course with the Catalyst, Lanre Olusola. It was a divine arrangement as trust me, I couldn't afford the class but without even knowing me, he gave me a scholarship for the course!

Initially, I was going to only attend the Masters Goal Setting classes only but I ended up doing the full Life Coach Certification Course. The classes were in Lekki at the Olusola Lanre Coaching Academy and driving to and from the Mainland coupled with my children's school runs and work was quite hectic but I survived it and can now add Life Coach to my list of achievements (so feel free to consult me for Coaching Sessions...I no go charge you plenty Lol!) 

I am not saying being a Life Coach is the next step for everybody but the truth is there is always a next step and you need to prayerfully figure out what it is so you don't spend your days just running around chasing money in the wrong places.

Prior to attending that course, I thought I had goals after all I was a hustler and keeping my head up despite being a single mum but the truth is I was just running around in circles and not being very productive even though I thought I was. The unrest I felt in me was my spirit's way of telling me to make a reassessment of my life so I get back on track. 

Reassessment is very vital for all of us, 2015 will become history in a few days, please sit down and examine who exactly you want to be and the steps to take getting there. If you are already on track....kudos to you just strategise on improvement BUT if you are not, please, please and please, its never too late to make a turnaround and get back on board your positive life train.

At the beginning of 2015, I NEVER even envisaged this but now December 2015, it has finally taken shape! Sinach's song "I Know Who I Am" now has a deeper meaning for me. God does answer prayers and orders one's steps and amazingly SO MUCH has changed about me spiritually, emotionally, psychologically & even physically! 

I have learnt afresh to dump limiting beliefs, change my negative mindset, pick up new, refined values and finally I am transitioning into who God created me to be with greater opportunities to maximise my potential.
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